So have been doing my research and there doesn't seem to be much information out there on depression and what to expect after surgery. Now don't get me wrong I try to keep things upbeat lighthearted and motivational but, I am human too and when I did my
research I didn't see much out there on the subject so I thought I would tackle it.
When I came home the day of my surgery I was told to rest take my medication and follow my orders from my doctor. However, I wasn't told was that I was going to need to pee in a pot because I couldn't make it to the bathroom! I was crazy, annoying, and nasty to be around!! I was just plain miserable.
Now flash ahead here we are three weeks and I will tell you that the struggle is real!!!
I'm stuck at home learning to walk again, I basically hang out my PJ's and I believe now that showers are overrated and it's really difficult to wash your hair.
I feel unpretty, I feel disgusting, I feel tired all the time. I feel swollen bloated and like a lump of shit in my permanent indentation on the couch.
It's really hard to feel sexy with crutches, sweat pants. and crusty hair.
You get the PICTURE!!
When I do take a shower and exhaust me, I really just don't feel like myself at all.
So I was talking to my life coach therapist about this yesterday and he said it's a pretty common thing! And I cried a little after he said that.... I'm NOT going MAD i am Normal!!
It's common for people to feel not like themselves, it's common for people to be a little bit depressed after having surgery. Life still goes on around you so it's common to feel unworthy of help, or have a hard time, or just get exhausted by always asking for someone to get you something you have stared at ALL DAY!!
It's a whole new routine and each day is something different, recently I went to my doctors after being prescribed for Percocet for the last three months since I injured my knee September 18th, 2015 and I was having flu like symptoms....with a fever.
So I called the doctor and found out that I am actually
going through withdrawal symptoms from the medication.
GREAT!! Now I am a Junkie Gimp!!
I was prescribed all the medication I am taking and It's crazy to me to think that on top of everything that I have going on,now have to deal with this over the next few days.
It makes me want to question my doctors even more in the future. I'm not saying what they do is wrong, and I'm not saying prescriptions are wrong when they are necessary. Trust Me They were needed, but why was and I forewarned of this.
I'm thankful that I know myself and I'm thankful that I'm in a place where I know my health or I may not of even known what was going on. Having a bad day is one thing but having a bad day and feeling like you can't get out of bed is another. It's a mental game and the struggle is real I know eventually this will be a thing of the past but for right now.... I am OVER IT!!
I just want to speak openly and honestly on the subject.
I don't want to scare you but make you prepared.
Things I needed while recovering that were NOT on the Dr List!!
If you've recently had something tragic happened in your life, a surgery, a loss, loss of job? So many things the list could go on and on. Knowing that you're depressed and taking the steps to move forward possibly by talking to someone or diving into a good book and just motivating yourself to be strong it's so important!!!
I can see where people could fall into that trap of the Dark side when you have a lot going on it's hard to focus on just your recovery and where you come from when you have
so much further to go.
Just know that you're not alone. Know that I and someone else out
there are feeling exactly the way you do right now.
Soon you will be back to YOU!
My saving grace has been being able to work from home! Feeling success is important to me and I love being able to give more of my time during this!
Remember you have to have bad days to really appreciate the good!!
Allow yourself to have a bad day... you are human, then switch gears and focus on how you are going to COME BACK! :)